Look, I get it. It really sucks having a Pussy-grabbing War-Mongering Racist Cheeto in control of everything we say and do right now, but seriously — if you cancel the Trump show now I will have nothing to tweet about tomorrow.

I mean c’mon, did you see Eminem drop the mic last night? He was all like….Trump and the packers and Colin and arrrgh and…It. Was. Epic. EPIC! I hope Trump and Eminem get into a twitter war. That would be awesome.

And speaking of Kaepernick? OMG…Kaepernick. He’s so hot. Like, that’s a revolution I can get behind. I mean, I totally think people should get to protest. It’s not like they’re going all black lives matter on everyone, right? So let them do what they want. I can’t wait for next Sunday, though. We have bets at the office.

Hold on — “yes, one pumpkin spice latte please. Just put the change in the charity bowl.”

Where was I? I got distracted by saving third world children. Oh right….

Speaking of kids, did you see all those children without food and water in Puerto Rico? It’s so terrible. Trump is such a jerk for not saving them. That country really needs some help. J-Lo and Pittbull sent supplies at least. They’re so cool. Remember On the Floor? That was my jam! I hope they play a benefit concert.

Speaking of concerts, did you see all those people get shot in Nevada? Just awful. The guy that did it was a millionaire, you know. Must’ve been crazy or something. They still don’t know. I bet he just lost his shit or something. Rich white folks don’t kill people usually. I saw James Aldean singing on Saturday night live about it. So sad. But so inspiring! I really think we can end gun violence if we all come together. I even tweeted about it.

Anyways, I love SNL. Those skits with Alec Baldwin as Trump — so good. Sure miss those Spicer sketches, though. Wonder who they’re going to take on next week. The Resistance is really gaining momentum with all these celebrities. Clips are always trending. I wonder who’s going to play Kin-Jong-whatever his name is. That fight between him and Trump is so funny. It’s like…grab the popcorn!

I don’t think Trump is going to nuke anyone though. I mean, I’m sure we’ll stop him. Just like we saved healthcare. Did you call your Senator? I called AND tweeted. I’m really dedicated. I heard the Cheeto is trying to kill it anyways, but we stopped him once. I’m sure someone will do something. We have great healthcare at my office. Everyone should just have that. Hmmmm….maybe I should tweet that to my Representative.

I really think if we tweet more and make more phone calls, though,Trump will have to be kicked out of office. I mean, that’s how it works, right? We are the People!

Anyways, Trump should definitely be impeached at least. I’m pretty sure if the polling gets low enough, Congress will do it. And that means we get a Democrat in office, I think. I guess we just have to wait a little longer. Drip, drip drip, right?

Til then, you know I’m going to be RT’ing Eminem’s freestyle all day. Cuz I’m a resistor and THIS is #TheResistance.

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